Saturday 16 July 2011

Off the rocks? On the rocks?

 Turns out love isn’t as straightforward as marriage and divorce. Cheryl Cole (wonder why she never went back to Tweedy?) is entertaining public displays of affection with her ex-husband, just eight months after the divorce was finalised. And JLo is getting divorced… Again! Third time lucky? Maybe this divorce is "the one".

Even now, as Cheryl and Ashley are rekindling, rumours of EVEN more infidelity are circling (note to self, never marry a footballer). And, I’m afraid, Cheryl I have no sympathy; a cheater does not change its spots, certainly not in eight months anyway.

Now "our" little northern Cheryl is only 28 and she just wishes "the media wud leave us alone" but I’m afraid by being beautiful, and successful, that means it’s never going to happen, we’re all just far too damn interested. But there is only so far the Cheryl – Ashley saga can go before it becomes tiresome and we’re already wading through the "been there" territory. I was quite excited for the Cheryl journey – who would be the man who taught her to love again? And I’ll be very disappointed if it is going to be the uncharismatic, unfaithful (equally disloyal with football clubs) Mr. Cole… Yawn.

So JLo are we still not to be fooled by the ‘rocks that [you’ve] got’? Was this lyric always referring to engagement ‘rocks’? If so, that went straight over my head? I’ve never really got JLo’s taste in men – P Diddy? Eugh? The first husband, Noa? Who? Exactly. Chris Judd – could have been any other dancer. Ben Affleck – out of shape, self-indulgent actor. And the latest fatality, Marc Anthony, which I expected great things on hearing his name and then was very disappointed to discover he looked like a Spanish Billy Crystal. Not at all the forceful Roman General I was expecting. And JLo’s next move? Well I’m not at all excited, or even that bothered. I think she parallels her recent TV adventure American Idol, the best has been had.

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